As I’m putting out Chapter 6 of my historical romance entitled Sweet Liberty, I can’t believe that it’s already the 14th of January. Two Thousand Seventeen is already moving fast.

With ghostwriting and beginning-of-the-year chores (like balancing checkbooks that I’m far too behind on) to do around the house, I’m a bit surprised that I was able to work this in.

I hope you enjoy the next Chapter 6 of Sweet Liberty. I’m still hoping that I can get my contemporary romance online by the end of February, but paid work comes first. I just can’t guarantee it.

 

Chapter 6

 

A man’s soft, ragged breathing drifted to her ears, and Libby smiled in the dark. For the past few nights, she’d heard Nate snoring softly like that, and it gave her a sense of peace knowing that he was there. Now that Ross was with them, she appreciated Nate’s presence even more. She needed to tell him that, too.

Dropping down from the wagon, she made her way quietly to Nate’s side so she didn’t awaken the others. She stood over him for several minutes, trying to gather the courage to wake him. After all, he worked hard to take care of them. He needed as much sleep as he could get. But she desperately needed to talk to him, and she couldn’t do it with Ross awake. Drawing in a deep breath for courage, Libby sank to her knees.

She gently shook his shoulder, and Nate rolled onto his side with a groan. She shook him again, a little harder. Opening his eyes, he rolled to his back again, whispering angrily, “Leave me the hell alo…” He stared up at her in shock. “Miss Liberty?”

Cocking her finger in a silent gesture that he join her, she rose and watched while he followed suit. Wordlessly taking his hand, she led him away from the others.

When they were far enough away from camp for assured privacy, she stopped and turned to gaze up at him. “I wanted to thank you for intervening when Hiram and I were alone this evening. I would have told you sooner, but I didn’t want him to know that I was alone with you. I think he’s jealous of you, although I told him there’s nothing between us.”

“You’re entirely welcome, Miss Libby. I’m glad I was able to help. There’s no doubt that he’s jealous. He’s made it perfectly clear to me in ways he probably doesn’t even realize. If there’s ever anything else I can to do keep him away from you, just holler.”

As he examined her in the light of the moon, an expression Libby had never seen before came to his blue eyes. For some reason, it made her feel warm inside, but she wasn’t about to admit it—especially to him, because he would only say something arrogant again, and she had other things she wanted to discuss.

To rid herself of her thoughts, she smiled up at him. His responded with a smile so wide that Libby wondered if he would burst with excitement. But all she’d done was smile at him—just like she’d done many times before. Why did he have such a different expression? More importantly, why did it make her feel so powerful over him?

Forcing such thoughts from her mind, she said, “I also want to thank you for not hitting him. I could tell that you wanted to.”

Nate’s grin turned playful. “I’m not sure I can say you’re welcome to that. I wanted to give him one solid blow to the mouth, and I can’t promise I won’t eventually. He strikes me as an obnoxious little bas— runt. I’d love nothing more than to teach him a lesson. It took all the willpower I had not to strike him with a blow that would knock him to the ground.”

“I know. I could feel your tension when you touched me. That’s why I woke you. I want you to know that I’m grateful for your restraint.”

“That’s why you woke me in the middle of the night?” he asked, his voice filled with irritation. “To tell me that you’re grateful?”

Suddenly, Libby regretted her decision. Why had she thought that Nate would appreciate knowing how she felt? Embarrassed by her behavior, she turned her back on him and spoke softly. “Now I’ve made you angry. I couldn’t sleep because I wanted to tell you, but I can’t seem to do anything without Hiram being there. It’s embarrassing that he won’t let me out of his sight, and the only way I could think of to talk to you privately was to wake you up. I’m sorry.”

Chuckling, Nate stepped around her. With two fingers under her chin, he lifted her head until she looked up at him.

“I’m not angry, Miss Libby,” he said. “I’m surprised. Normally, you would never even consider waking me up. I was pleased, but still surprised. I thought of waking you, too, but decided against it. I didn’t want to be accused of being arrogant again. Fortunately, this time you came to me, so you can’t accuse me. Besides, I’m not arrogant because I think you’re a very lovely lady. I also think you’re also a very lonely lady, and I want to keep you company. You can’t fault me for that, can you?”

Her face heated. Hopefully, it was dark enough where they were so he couldn’t see her blush. She didn’t want him to know that his words had affected her. She was lonely, although she hadn’t realized it until she met Nate. He had brought something forth inside her that she didn’t know existed. Now she wanted to explore those feelings, but she didn’t want him to realize that she would miss him when he left them.

Struggling to keep her voice from cracking, she said, “Please, Nate. I woke you for a serious talk, and you’re teasing me.”

“To the contrary, Miss Libby. I’m very serious.” Reaching out, he tenderly grasped her upper arms and rubbed them. “I’m glad you woke me. I wanted to be alone with you more than anything else. Will told me some things tonight while you were walking with Ross, and I wanted you to confirm them.”

His hands on her arms sparked her imagination, calling forth the recollection of his kisses. Not only had she enjoyed his caresses, she’d enjoyed the taste and smell of his pipe tobacco, even though she’d originally believed both would be unpleasant. But she’d discouraged him then and must continue to do so as long as they were traveling together.

Much to her confusion, however, she couldn’t force herself to dissuade him from this small, intimate caress. Instead, she longed for him to hold her close, kiss her softly, or even passionately. Yes, that was it. She wanted—no needed—him to kiss her.

Staring up at him, she opened her mouth slightly. As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t tell him her thoughts and desires. She wanted to speak, but nothing came out. He had bewitched her again! No, that wasn’t it. She couldn’t speak because she was terrified that she would show him her feelings.

“Will told me that Ross said your life had never been in danger,” Nate continued, intruding into her thoughts, “but tonight you compared his saving your life and my saving Flossie’s. If what Ross told Will is true—and I suspect it isn’t—there is no comparison. And if what Ross told Will isn’t true, what is? I don’t trust him, Miss Libby. I don’t trust him at all.”

His words bought her back to more mundane thoughts, and her words finally made their way from her vocal cords. “Maybe he told Will that to spare Will’s feelings.” She hadn’t thought of that before, and now that she had, she wondered if it was true. “Or possibly so he wouldn’t worry.”

“I doubt it. Will described your wound and told me that you were feeling fine within a week. That doesn’t sound to me like you were on the brink of death.”

Confused by what he was saying and what she knew to be true, Libby jerked away from him. Tears came to her eyes and trickled down her cheeks. Ross had told her the same thing he’d told Will. Why? Because he’d wanted her to feel so grateful that she would agree to marry him? It was likely after what he’d said earlier. Now she was so confused she didn’t know what to do.

A moment after she pulled away from him, Nate swept her into his arms. Libby almost panicked. She couldn’t let this happen, because she knew where it would lead. As much as she wanted a kiss, she also feared her reaction to one. She might lose her last semblance of control if she didn’t get him to release her. But when she tried to push away, she found that his tender hold was too secure to break. Then his deep, soothing voice drifted to her ears.

“I’m sorry, Miss Liberty. I should have thought before I spoke of death. You must miss your parents terribly.”

Her heart constricted, increasing her tears. Nate had misunderstood! But despite the ache in her chest, she felt a sense of happiness. For the first time in her life, she felt truly content. For several moments, she merely listened to the beat of his heart as her ear pressed against his hard chest. Then, from somewhere deep within her, a breeze lapped at the smoldering spark within her, enlarging the area already consumed.

Despite all of Nate’s arrogance, despite all of his aggressiveness, he cared about others. Maybe he wasn’t as bad as she’d originally thought. Maybe she didn’t have to contain whatever she was feeling.

“It’s all right, Nate,” she said quietly. “Honest. I’m not upset by what you said. I’m tired and confused.”

“What are you confused about? Maybe I can explain. I’d like to help if I can. In fact, very little would make me happier than helping you.”

“If you don’t mind, it’s something I want to find an answer on my own.”

“Are you sure you aren’t grieving? I don’t want you to think you have to hide it from me. There’s honestly nothing I’d like better than to help you with your problems, Miss Libby, to soothe your heart. It’s not just something I’m saying to reinforce my gallantry in your eyes. I sincerely mean it.”

“You’re very kind to offer, but that won’t be necessary.”

He paused for several seconds then questioned her hesitantly. “Don’t you ever get angry, Miss Libby? Will told me that you never shout, but I find that hard to believe of anyone—even you.”

Delighting in the comfort of his embrace, she snuggled against him to put her head in a more comfortable position and slide her arms around him in return. Being in his arms felt so good, so she easily remained calm when she talked to him.

“It’s true in my case, Nate. After my mother died—I was only four at the time, but I remember it very clearly—I decided that I would never raise my voice in anger. She and Papa had had an argument about my snakebite shortly before she fell down a flight of stairs. She was due to have a baby in a matter of weeks and lost it after the fall. Mama died two weeks later, and she blamed my brother’s death on Papa until the end. Right then I pledged that I would never argue with anyone like that. Now it’s become a part of me.”

“That’s understandable.”

“Papa loved Mama desperately. So did I. At my young age, I vowed never to love anybody else that much again, never to love anybody as much as Papa loved Mama. I thought that, if I didn’t love, I could never be hurt. Maybe that’s why I never married.”

“I suppose that’s possible.”

Without warning, he tightened his hold on her and moved so fast that she couldn’t react. His lips bore down on hers demandingly. Her mind told her to resist, but her body melted against his. She came even closer against him as she relaxed in his arms. Oh, how she enjoyed the exciting new sensations that exploded within her whenever his mouth captured hers. But she was afraid of them, too. No other man had ever made her feel like this, and she didn’t know what it meant. Right now, she didn’t even care. Nate was kissing her again, and that was all that mattered.

Instinctively, she slid her hands up his back to his shoulder blades. Then his kiss changed. It became tender now that she had responded. Still, she did nothing more than return his embrace. She had so little experience in this aspect of the male-female friendship that she didn’t know what to do. She only knew that she enjoyed what he was doing to her, and she wanted him to enjoy how she reacted to him.

Her feet left the ground as he lifted her. He sank to his knees and laid her gently on the ground without breaking the kiss. He came down beside her as his hand roamed to her waist, down her left thigh, then up to her covered breast. There it lingered momentarily, taunting the nipple through the fabric of her shirt and camisole.

The sensations were almost unbearable, but she didn’t want them to end, either. They were the most incredible feelings she’d ever had, and in that moment, she realized that she would never tire of them. A moan of pleasure escaped from a place so deep within her that she was surprised it existed. Then, to her dismay, he broke the kiss.

She stared up at him nervously, unsure what she’d done to make him stop. Whatever it was, though, she needed to discover it so she didn’t repeat it. As badly as she wanted him to continue, she couldn’t tell him. But what they were doing simply wasn’t …

He kissed the tip of her nose, and she sighed. No! she told herself. Don’t do that or he won’t stop. But her eyelids slid shut. His soft lips caressed first one then the other while his thumb toyed with her hardened nipple. Next he kissed each cheekbone then her chin. Finally, he nuzzled her neck just below her ear. To her surprise, a violent shudder raced through her as a tingling sensation shot from her ear to her elbow. Instinctively, she shrugged her shoulder.

Chuckling, he rose to his elbow and propped his head up on his fist. His free hand slid across her chest and tenderly massaged her other breast. A moment later, he slipped it up to her bare neck.

Libby protested in a whisper. “Nate, please. This isn’t right. What if Willie or Flossie see us? We shouldn’t do this. I’m not that kind of a woman.”

“We’re not doing anything to be ashamed of,” he replied in a like tone as he stroked her cheekbone with his thumb. “And I can tell that you’re enjoying yourself as much as I am.”

“That doesn’t mean what we’re doing is right. It isn’t. It’s sinful.”

“We haven’t done anything sinful. We haven’t even broken a commandment. And I haven’t taken you against your will, which I would never do. I know when I’m with a lady, and I know when I’m with a whore. I could never forget that you’re a lady, either, so you have nothing to worry about. But I still want to hold you; I still want to kiss you.”

“Maybe you should find a city or town that has a bordello where you can pay to hold and kiss a woman,” she suggested, despite the tightness in her chest that the mere thought created. “You can also pay to be intimate with her. Maybe then you’ll be satisfied.”

“That’s not what would satisfy me. What satisfies me is exactly what we were doing. Don’t you understand?” he asked. “I don’t want a whore I can bed. I want a lady I can have a meaningful friendship with, and I don’t want just any lady. I want the one in my arms.”

Despite her desire that he kiss her again, Libby avoided his lips as they approached hers. “No, Nate. You’ve been alone a long time. It isn’t me you want. It’s female companionship. Any woman would do.”

Caressing her face, he shook his head. “If that were true, I wouldn’t have turned Flossie down the other night. No, my sweet Liberty, I’ve done it, and now you need to face the facts. You’re the lady I want to hold, and you’re the one I want to kiss. That’s the only satisfaction I need right now.”

Sliding away from him, she scrambled to her feet. She had to stop this before things turned into something even more intimate. Straightening her clothes nervously, she watched him rise. “You said it yourself, Nate. You said it’s the only satisfaction you need right now. I won’t let this happen again, because maybe next time you’ll want more satisfaction, and I won’t allow more.”

Afraid that he would try to dissuade her, she spun from him and hurried away. If she didn’t get back to camp, he would probably convince her that what they’d done was all right, and she couldn’t let him do that.

He called her name, but she didn’t stop. Instead, she increased her speed. Behind her, she could hear his hasty footfalls as he followed her back.

As soon as she returned, she lay down in her bedroll and, despite her belief that the incident would keep her awake, promptly fell asleep.

 

Nate wandered into camp a few moments later. While he watched Libby get comfortable, he sank down beside the fire. With a tired sigh, he stared at the flames.

What had he done? Completely alienated Libby, that’s what! And why? Because he turned into a lecher every time he was alone with her. He became a man obsessed with tasting her mouth, feeling her small, supple body against his. And he couldn’t seem to restrain his desires no matter how hard he tried.

Maybe Libby was right. Maybe he should find a woman to satisfy his masculine needs. That would be a hell of a lot better than having Libby angry with him all the time because he was incapable of restraint. But he didn’t want another woman. He only wanted to be near Libby.

“Where did you and Libby go, Nate?”

Nate started and gazed up at Will as the young man sat down beside him. Knowing that Will would never settle for a quick response, Nate sighed heavily. “For a walk. Miss Libby wanted to thank me for intervening with Ross earlier—and for not hitting him.”

“Did she let you kiss her again?” Will asked.

“It isn’t polite to ask a question like that, Will. I’d suggest that you not do it again, or you might find yourself in a fight.”

“Why? What did I say wrong this time? You already know that I saw you kiss her before. Why is it so bad for me to ask if you did it again?”

“A gentleman doesn’t ask for that information, and a gentleman certainly doesn’t divulge if even if another man asks. When a gentleman kisses a lady, he keeps his mouth shut about it. It isn’t something to talk about. Do you understand?”

Will grinned at Nate from across the campfire. “Sure. You kissed her.”

“You, William Nichols, are incorrigible. Let’s change the subject.”

“Why? I like to talk about you and Libby. She likes you a lot, too. I can tell. She won’t admit it, of course, but she does. And that lousy doctor? He isn’t good for her. She needs a man like you.”

“I’ve got to admit,” Nate said bitterly, “that that damned bastard is nothing but a blundering idiot. But his manners are normally refined and impeccable. He’s probably perfect for her. I wish I didn’t believe that, because I could throw him a hell of a lot farther than I trust him. But Liberty is a lady, and ladies need men who are refined.” Nate paused to sigh. “That could have been me at one time, but since I left home, I’ve lost that quality. I’ve spent too much time alone, too much time away from civilization.”

“That doesn’t matter so much does it, Nate? Can’t a man still be good for a lady even if he’s been alone for a long time?”

“I suppose, but Liberty is different.” Nate sighed again, hating the things he was saying but saying them anyway in the hope he could believe them if he did. “She needs a man who can give her all of the good things in life. She deserves fine clothes, a fine house, servants. Your sister is well-bred, Will. Take it from a man who’s seen all kinds of women—from fancy ladies to whores. She needs a man who can give her those things. And, as much as I hate to admit it, that blundering idiot of a doctor can do just that. He’s the man who’s good for your sister—not me. I’m nothing but a straggly trapper who’s been away from civilization far too long.”

“I think he’s bad for her,” Will declared. “And I’m going to do everything I can to keep them apart.”

“Don’t you want to see her happy?”

“Sure, but you’re the man who can make her happy—not Ross.”

“More than anything, I wish that were true, but it’s not. Let her be, Will. Then things will turn out for her the way they should.” Rising, Nate wandered to his bedroll. “I need some sleep. Let’s go back to bed. We’ll talk again some other time.”